What’s on my mind? I’ve always wanted a pond. This week, I got my wish. It took one long day for not-me to dig out the deep-rooted shrubbery and big rocks where the pond is now; another long day to build the pond and its waterfall; one day to landscape it; and another day to stand back and admire it.
A pond! At last! All we need now is for the ground cover not-me planted to take hold and spread.
I especially like the pond’s waterfall, which trickles over flat shale stones as a soothing sound. I like soothing sounds. I find them so ... soothing. A few days ago, not-me added a small lily pad (which will grow into a large lily pad and flower), a water hyacinth (which will also flower) and some “green dots.”
These aren’t your everyday green dots. These are lah-di-dah green dots with some Latinate green-dot name known only to stout ladies in large hats who chair small-town garden society meetings (No offence intended, Florence).
(None taken, bitch - F.)
These aren’t your everyday green dots. These are lah-di-dah green dots with some Latinate green-dot name known only to stout ladies in large hats who chair small-town garden society meetings (No offence intended, Florence).
(None taken, bitch - F.)
While lily pads, pond hyacinths and green dots are technically considered weeds, they look beautiful and aren’t hard for not-me to control in a small pond. What is hard to control is the three-year-old who toddles over to that same pond to eat lily pads, hyacinths and green dots. Two words: Induce vomiting. One word: HELP!
Do not let an untended three-year-old near your pond. Do not let an untended blankety-blank-year-old near your pond. She won’t lift a finger, but is very good at pointing to tell you where and how to dig, install, and landscape said pond.
Do not let an untended three-year-old near your pond. Do not let an untended blankety-blank-year-old near your pond. She won’t lift a finger, but is very good at pointing to tell you where and how to dig, install, and landscape said pond.
Even simple, low-maintenance ground cover needs weeding, so not-me added slate flagstones around the pond, to help access whatever Latinate weeds not-me may find. However …!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bW7Op86ox9g
Rising early this morning, I stepped out the door to admire the pond. Our lily pad was gone! Our pond was filthy! Raccoons had been doing the back stroke and having a mud bath in our beautiful pond!
There’s trouble in River City! Oh, we got trouble! And it starts with T and it rhymes with P for ... pond.
Tonight, Himself shook most of a big bottle of Mexican hot sauce on the stones encircling the pond. “That’ll get rid of those raccoons,” he said. “They’re no match for hot sauce!”
“B-b-but …”
“Trust me.”
Which I do, but if we see them wearing sombreros and joining a mariachi band, we’ll know there really is trouble in River City.
Which I do, but if we see them wearing sombreros and joining a mariachi band, we’ll know there really is trouble in River City.
© Nicole Parton, 2019
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